Sunday, February 24, 2008

Dear Santa

I've given up the evil tobacco. I'm ready to collect my returns now, at your convenience.

My health? What is that? I can't eat it. I can't wear it. I can't take it to dinner. I can't even see it. (I have a cold, so I still can't taste anything and my throat still feels terrible when I wake up. It doesn't look like anything else has changed either.)

I deserve an exotic, immense worldly reward. Gimme.

3 comments:

ĄηğэĻĭšTїÇ said...

So glad that u did :)

Anonymous said...

How many successful days is it now?

Mind you, according to the tobacco research bureau, you are still a potential candidate unless you have stopped smoking for "at least seven years"

- Santa

Gargoyle said...

Dear Santa,
42 days now. I'm probably a potential candidate for the rest of my life. Always an ex-smoker, never a non-smoker. That's why I deserve rich worldly rewards.

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